My Memoirs of Ana & Mia

rebeccaanne___ I tried to conceal the pain you made Behind a brave fabricate But you took the feeling from my soul And let me fall into a lonely hole I tried to hide the wounds by using my body to sell my soul All my scars were burrowed deep inside And the painful sentiments that my heart yearned for and cried Memories of the girl that was strong, brave and a warrior To trust the wrong person, a man of evil, i couldn't be sorrier I didn't want this stupid trauma  I didn't want to be hiding in some dark corner You took away apart of my life, apart of who i was You made me lose my friends, you made me hide away from life You made me someone I couldn't recognise in the mirror You made me someone that no longer shone or could shimmer You are a beast, a bad man, a criminal and you're truly evil No amount of punishment could be pay back compared to the pain I have to conceal You don't deserve life on earth. You vulgar and misogynistic asshole You lied...

when you’re ready, when you’re there! REBECCA ADAMS · TUESDAY, NOVEMBER 20, 2018 An excuse is not a reason, but justifying something and living with humiliation is because you know actions and impulsive moves or messaging was completely random but self expressive. That trying to fix a problem can leave you remaining in limbo. Trying to fix and say sorry again, but then making it worse in your own mind and unsure how to rewind and put together the exact nail on the head words to hit the person and be able to be happy. It is misunderstood and intentions so good can be seen as a way someone decides to perceive. Humility becomes humiliation. Your mind is a million miles an hour. How did a conversation become so dominated by emotions and the past? How did your mind make you feel you were in a particular time and relive it again? Is it a dream? Or you confuse reality with your own mind and you say what you wish you said over and over. You learn too little, too late....

"Since the age of 9, i clenched my fists From the final post, a razor to the wrist Art comes from some kind of pain and you are the one driving yourself insane The monsters that live inside my head They control my thoughts, make me wish i was dead I can't pretend I have hope. I can't live a lie.  i leave you here, with my sincerest goodbye "